every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end

a thought just occurred to me. a single thought that turned into many thoughts which is now turning into this blog. i have had many endings and beginnings in my life. i'm sure you all have too. it's kind of a natural occurrence as a person grows and moves through their life. i was thinking of a particular ending when i was 15 years old and how i did not realize the significance of that event nor its ending back then. it wasn't until now that i thought about how that ending set the stage for many endings to come. it certainly wasn't the first ending in my life and not even close to most significant, but it got me thinking of how much a person must adapt to changes. things ending while others begin. it happens all the time. even without our awareness or wanting.

on this particular day, shortly after my 15th birthday, i had just boarded a greyhound bus in jamestown, nd. i was going home after a summer away. away from most things i had known. my parents, my siblings, my friends and my home. i had been staying with my aunt and uncle, working in the hotel that they were managing at the time. it was a wonderful experience and i am grateful that my parents trusted me enough to allow me to go. i learned a lot that summer but didn't realize it or even think about it until now. that summer was one of the best summers i had growing up.

anyways, as the bus drove away i started to cry. why, i wasn't sure at the time. i was excited to go home. my family was moving into a new house and i was starting high school in a few weeks. ok, so i was nervous too about all the changes that had taken place while i was gone but also very glad to be getting back to normal. but i had formed these great relationships and i didn't want to leave them behind knowing they would not stay the same. that summer i had so much freedom, with my parents being over 1,000 miles away it was difficult to keep them in the loop. i had met so many interesting people that have definitely influenced me throughout the years in different ways. i guess it was the mix of emotions that finally got to me as the bus pulled away. it was the ending of a very important event in my life and the beginning of a new adventure at home.

i hated that bus ride. the people were so weird and scary! i was terrified. i even considered getting off the bus somewhere in montana and calling my parents to come pick me up. i didn't think i could handle one more second of it. but, in the end i sucked it up and got back on the bus knowing the inconvenience it would have been for them. i was lucky to not have to sit next to someone most of the way. until we reached ogden and the bus filled up. an old, stinky, dirty, dingy guy asked if he could sit by me. he even called me "sweetie" which freaked me out even more. i remember staring out of the window the whole time trying not to smell him, see him, hear him, or touch him. i couldn't have been more happy to get to the depot in salt lake. ugh, was i glad to be back. i haven't ridden the bus since! alas, i digress.

so, here i am in the midst of a new beginning. graduation marked the ending of my life as a student. now, i've got my license and have started seeing clients helping them through their life's transitions. i truly love the work i do, although it does have its moments, it is something i have dreamt about for a long time. i just can't help but think about the summer i spent as a housekeeper in teeny, tiny jamestown.